I Don't Know Whether to Fear or Look Forward to Senility

Kinja'd!!! "Jcarr" (jcarr)
02/11/2016 at 13:55 • Filed to: None

Kinja'd!!!1 Kinja'd!!! 21

Email I just got from my wife about a scene she witnessed while at the Dr.’s office:

An elderly woman (Emma) being escorted by a caregiver (CG) arrived when I did. She was wheeled in a wheelchair to the waiting area just before I walked over there to sit down.

After about a minute, Emma started making multiple unsuccessful attempts to stand up out of her wheelchair.

CG: Do you want to get up?

Emma says nothing, and tries to get up again.

CG: Do you want to sit in the chair? [They were next to a row of chairs.] You need to tell me if you want to get up, so I can put the brake on.

The Caregiver helps Emma up. As she is helping Emma up, she says..

CG: We didn’t bring your walker with us—that makes it a little harder.

Emma: You probably put it in your pocket.

CG: Your walker? ..I don’t think it would fit.

Emma: He probably did it. [I don’t know who she was talking about. I don’t think the Caregiver did either.]

CG: Do you want to sit in the chair?

Emma: No. [Now standing.]

CG: Do you want to walk around?

Emma: Yes.

They walk around the waiting area in a small circle.

CG: Do you want to go around one more time?

Emma moves toward a chair. The Caregiver helps her sit down.

CG: Does your stomach feel okay now?

Emma: No. I hope it pukes all over everyone.

CG: Oh.

Emma gets up again with the Caregiver’s help. She walks over to her wheelchair, but instead of sitting down in it, she starts pushing it.

Emma: Did you move that?

CG: Yes, I put your wheelchair there.

Emma: Get him out of here.

CG: Who? The chair?

Emma: Well, yes, I’ve known him for years.

Lord, please don’t ever let me be that far gone.


DISCUSSION (21)


Kinja'd!!! CB > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:03

Kinja'd!!!3

I’m probably going to write up a legal document to have me euthanized if I ever become senile. Or just to put me in a boat and let me coast out to sea.


Kinja'd!!! ttyymmnn > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:04

Kinja'd!!!2

God bless Emma’s caregiver.


Kinja'd!!! pauljones > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:05

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By the time you’re that far gone, you won’t even care. Just hang a batsuit in your closet so that you can fuck with yourself when you go senile.

At the ripe old age of 93: “I’M BATMAN!? HOLY CRAP, I’M BATMAN!!!!”


Kinja'd!!! Nibbles > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:06

Kinja'd!!!0

I honestly hope I’m gone before I reach that point. Given family history, that point is all but definite. It’s kinda scary to think about; I watched both grandfathers go past the brink. My father is heading that way at a good clip himself.


Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > ttyymmnn
02/11/2016 at 14:06

Kinja'd!!!0

No kidding.


Kinja'd!!! Future next gen S2000 owner > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:07

Kinja'd!!!1

I’m totally looking forward to it.


Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > Nibbles
02/11/2016 at 14:08

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I’m not worried for myself as much as I am for those who would have to deal with me. That must not be fun.


Kinja'd!!! Nibbles > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:09

Kinja'd!!!0

That’s why I hope I’m gone before then. I shudder at the thought of being that kind of burden on anyone


Kinja'd!!! TheRealBicycleBuck > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:09

Kinja'd!!!1

Listen to how the caregiver’s attitude makes all the difference.

http://www.npr.org/player/v2/medi…


Kinja'd!!! Sir_Stig: and toxic masculinity ruins the party again. > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:09

Kinja'd!!!1

Yeah if my wife dies before me I’m going to start smoking a pipe and just indulging in all the vices that are supposed to be not great for health, learn wingsuit flying etc. If I ever become senile or need major surgery over the age of like 70 I just want to be able to go on my own terms.


Kinja'd!!! spanfucker retire bitch > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:09

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This is something I definitely fear. To lose all sense of rationale, sanity and awareness of ones environment and not even being aware that you lost it.

One of the reasons I’ve never drinken to excess in my life is that I need to have full control over my mental faculties at all times. Senility, alzheimers and anyting else along those lines scares the shit out of me.


Kinja'd!!! Birddog > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:15

Kinja'd!!!1

I used to see a lot of this at the retirement complex I worked at.

There was a memory care wing that just scared the hell out of me.


Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > Birddog
02/11/2016 at 14:17

Kinja'd!!!0

In high school, a few of my friends worked at a nursing facility. They always had stories.


Kinja'd!!! PotbellyJoe and 42 others > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:18

Kinja'd!!!1

If anything my family should be in fear of my senility.

The men in my family all die of broken down bodies but sharp minds, the women are the other way. Both tend to make their 90s. I don’t know which I would prefer, not knowing anyone or much of anything as your darkest hours approach, or knowing everything and being powerless against it.

Both are quite grim.

Avoiding a religious discussion here, but the darkness I mention is in Earthly relationships and life here.


Kinja'd!!! Berang > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:32

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Everybody in my family has stayed sharp ‘till the end, although most of them didn’t reach their 90s. So I guess there’s no telling.

On the flip side, I remember meeting a 94 year old man one night when I worked at target. Sharp but lonely, and incredibly sad. Everybody he grew up with was dead. He told me some stuff I wish I remembered better, about his first jobs and how he made 30 cents an hour, and later went on to supervise building dams and such. I should have asked him what his first car was. If I hadn’t been working I would have like to talk longer.


Kinja'd!!! MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:39

Kinja'd!!!0

Unfortunately my last grandparent left is almost this bad. Yet he’s still trying to push off assisted living and doesn’t want the caregivers around.

I’ll be calling him tonight like I always do.

He’ll forget I called him about 15 minutes after I call, but I’m the only grandchild that still calls and in that short 5-10 minute window I know I can make him happy.

It sucks though.


Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner
02/11/2016 at 14:44

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Yeah, my grandpa just turned 91 and he’s like this. He lives in a home and is happy, but his short-term memory is garbage.

Last summer we were visiting him and sitting in the lobby area. He got up to go back to his room to use the restroom. After about 15 minutes he hadn’t come back so we went to his room.

We walk in and he goes “Hey, what are you doing here?”.


Kinja'd!!! MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 14:57

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Mine is thankfully a bit better than that, but he’s almost 10 years younger. We’re not sure if it got drastically worse after my grammy passed away back in september or we found out she was covering for him... a lot.


Kinja'd!!! Jcarr > MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner
02/11/2016 at 15:38

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My grandpa still volunteered part-time and rode his bike everywhere up until my grandma died 6 years ago. Once she was gone he went downhill fast.


Kinja'd!!! MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > Jcarr
02/11/2016 at 16:52

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Yeah it’s seeming like a mix of both options


Kinja'd!!! Dru > Jcarr
02/12/2016 at 11:58

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I have had one relative suffer from this dreadful state. While visiting her a few months before she passed, another patient, at the nursing home where she was staying, wheeled up to me (somehow) in a wheelchair, propelling herself with her feet. The determination was quite impressive.

I did my best to converse, because I suppose that is what I would want someone else to do for me. I couldn’t discern much of what she said, as it was mostly mumbling. She shouted “Brandy!” at me multiple times. I am not sure if she was thinking of a person named Brandy or just wanted a swig of something.

At one point in time she took my hand and attempted to take a bite out of it. This actually happened more than once, so I grabbed a rather disinterested nurse and said “hey, she might be hungry, she keeps trying to eat my hand.”

In the name of all that is good, Oppos, if old Dru here begins to try and eat people's limbs, do us a favor, wont you?